HELLO FROM EAU CLAIRE, WISCONSIN - merchants slogan: "We don't have it but we can get it for you."

Monday, March 29, 2010


FYI: I screwed up and sent in my census form. Don't you make the same mistake and give Big Brother ammunition. Michele Bachman has it right! We'll all end up in internment camps.



Larry Heagle (copyright, March 20, 2010)

The Ballad of Theron Joseph Rubley
(as told to Larry Heagle by Mike Schlenker)

This is the ballad of TJ Rubley
And I'm gonna sing like Mike Schlenker told me
It's tragic as you'll soon see

Rubley was born in Davenport, Ioway
Pr'by where he shoulda stayed
He went to school in Tulsa Oklahoma
And quarterback is what he played

Young men seek fame in the NFL
But that didn't suit TJ
Instead of climbing to the top
His career went the other way

He played for the Rams, he played for the Packers'
And the Winnepeg Bombers Blue
And he might still be playing today
If he'd done what he was told to do

It was bck in 1995, the Pack wasn't far from home
They were just across the Mississppi River
Playin' in the Humpty-dump dome

It got late in the game, it was all tied up
At twenty four apiece
Then Brett went down on a real hard sack
by Randall in his war paint grease

So Holmgren sent in Squirrely Ty Detmar
Detmar such a crazy guy
Two plays later He went down
with a badly bruised left thigh

Came the now infamous moment
The coach pulled Rubley aside
The ball was on the Viking 38
With less than a minute to abide

It was second and one and Holmgren called
just for a quarterback sneak
Holmgren knew that a 3 point field goal
Would add to the Packer Streak

Rubley, he ran out to the huddle
snapped his helmet to his chin
Knelt in front of the offensive line
Said: "Here's is where we win!"

They all clapped hands, then yelled break (pause)
Sauntered up to the line
One eye on their opponents
the other on the waning time

Rubley looked to the left and to the right
And a safety caught his eye
That Queen was cheatin' up into the box
And Rubley he knew why

He paused in his count - thought about glory
and audibled a roll out pass
But he ended up throwing across his body
And got buried up to his -- elbow

The pigskin did a fleeting duck
And bounced off a corner back's hide
He hauled it in , ran to field goal range
And did a quarterback slide

With time running out the Queen's special team
Put the pigskin down in place
The Kick was high, the kick was good
you should seen Mike Holmgren's face

The Purple went wild, that damn horn blew
You could hear it al the way to Sioux Falls
Rubley might not hadda lotta smarts
But, man, he sure had balls!

This is the ballad of TJ Rubley
and his last play with Green Bay
I’ve told the story just as Mike Schlenker tells it
Oh, and by the way

Rubley was cut the very next morning
Sad ending for the effort he gave

And let it be known it was all the sadder (pause)
It set Vince spinning in his grave.

end with dramatic minor chord Em ( ya ta ta da, ya ta ta da, ya ta ta de yay)

1 comment:

Kirk said...

Surely you can't be serious about the census. Whew, anyone who believes anything that Bachman says is a bit off. Tis funny to see where states stnad to lose congress people because people aren't doing the census--specially in republican districts. "Hey, let's not fill out the census and teah ourselves a lesson."