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Friday, April 25, 2008

Mysteries of Life and Death And Between The Two

It is 4:30AM, Friday, April 25 and as usual, when I am on the road, I have had difficulty sleeping most of the night.

Last night's show for the Merrill Optimists went well, although whether it is because I hadn't worked in such a long time, or because the last time I worked was for the Brill Area Sportsmans' Club 50th Anniversary -- a gig that went about as well as any I have ever done as a performer of thirty odd years -- last night's show left me wanting. I just feel I never really got "into the groove".

One of my measuring sticks of how well I did, and this is perhaps a faulty premise, is the number of CD's I sell at a show. At the Brill gig I sold upwards of 15 -- last night I sold three.

I did sense a great deal of true affection from the folks of Merrill. Mayor Doug Williams, it turns out, has been a fan of mine for longer than I care to remember. He is originally from Los Angeles, California, where he did radio, but he has been a Wisconsin transplant long enough to call the Badger State his home.

The other gentlman responsible for getting my services was chief of police Ken Seubert. If the surname rings a bell with you it is because he is uncle to the young man who if not yet, soon, will be touting a Superbowl ring with the NY Giants.

Oh -- meant to tell you -- the Cadillac Escalade had disappeared from the parking lot by the time I got back from showering and dressing for the show, so I guess there was no foul play. At least I hope that is the case. Kathy didn't see who picked up the vehicle.

I am living with a heavy heart this morning. My wife Kim, in our telephone conversation last night, told me that her dad, who had suffered a severe stroke some four years ago and then recently broke his hip badly when he fell out of bed at the nursing home, has been moved to hospice, where he is being kept deeply sedated because of the severe pain.

The doctor has given him two weeks to live.

We have discussed the fact that the condition he has been in since the stroke is no way to live but it doesn't make the feelings that well up inside me any easier.

Then on top of that, today, after she finishes with her kindergartners, Kim will be leaving for the Cities to spend the weekend with her family, and I won't be able to go with her as I have another gig today in Minocqua for the middle school teachers inservice.

Perhaps I will jump in the Scion xB on Saturday morning and drive up separately.

I keep thinking back to how relatively easy both my parents passing was and how unfair it is that Bob, who is only 74, and who before the stroke, was a very vital man, now ends his earthly journey in such a difficult manner.

I want to be certain that Kim knows I am by her side through this as she was for me.


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