This morning I received an e mail from my good friend and confidante, Kurt Weber, who works in a mall in Burnsville, MN. It read as follows:
"While taking the trash down to the loading dock just now at the glorious mall I work at, I noticed one of the kiosks~~
"Holy Land Shopping Cart"-- featuring wood carved madonnas, crosses, and Jesuses(?)......."
So, of course, I sent Kurt the following message:
"Many thanks for bringing my attention to the "Holy Land Shopping Cart" which is a treasure trove of all things good and holy! Take, for instance, this sacred wooden statue of Jesus signaling a Vikings touchdown in the upcoming Super Bowl. How can the ViQueens possibly lose with Jesus as referee?? And this model (34 " X 15") XL sells for a mere $899.00. If Queens owner, Mr. Ziggy wants to guarantee victory I think he should buy the entire squad one of these. They could wear it around their necks during the game!"
Amen
Yes, I can see it all now. Fourth and half a yard from the Colts end zone - Mr. Quarterback fakes the hand off to AP who dives into the line. Mr. QB himself sprints (sort of) around right end and dives into the end zone to score! Ten Queens players immediatley yank the string securing referee Jesus close to their hearts -and as a group they hold them high! Oh, thank you, Jesus!
HOW THE ZIG-MEISTER CAN BUILD HIS BILLION DOLLAR RETRACTABLE ROOF STADIUM IN BLAINE AND SURROUND IT WITH A MALL THAT WILL PUT THE MALL OF AMERICA TO SHAME. MALL OF THE UNIVERSE!
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